Royals 5, Yankees 2

Well, the Yanks are hurt, the hitting is crummy, and only Wang--of the top three starters--has put together two good starts in a row, so instead I'll share with you the one thing that made me laugh out loud today. In "The Sports Guy," on ESPN's page two Bill Simmons shares this nugget:

STRANGEST HOLLYWOOD STORY OF THE WEEK

Jack Klugman wants his millions in "Quincy" residuals, and he wants them right now! I love the concept of "Quincy" losing money since it has been off the air -- how is that even possible? Not even James Dolan could pull that off. And since the subject is "Quincy," here's my imitation of the last line right before they headed to the first commercial of every "Quincy" episode: "It wasn't suicide, Sam, it was murder!!!!!!!" Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.

On that, more in a second. But consider this:

Follow-up note: I defy you to find a weirder opening credit sequence for a TV show than the one "Quincy" had -- it's a detective show about a coroner, only the music makes it sound like he's a bartender in the Caribbean, and then there are some slapstick sequences (like all the cops fainting) and everything ends with Quincy making time with some babe on a boat. He's a coroner! That might have been the goofiest show from that era that actually made it. Also, I love that there were no other stars from the show. It was like Jack Klugman knew back then, "They're gonna screw me on residuals 25 years from now. I can't have any other stars on this show!"

Yeah, pretty much.

Oh: I followed the link Simmons provided; it's the age-old story. Twenty-five years ago, James Garner was on Donahue saying precisely the same thing about "The Rockford Files."

In Hollywood there live accountants who will tell you, with a straight face, that Forrest Gump and Jurassic Park lost money.