If the umpire gets the call at second right (Molina had the runner dead), and if the Angels don't follow bloop after bloop after bloop before every blast, if anyone managed to be on base when A-Rod hit his homer, and if A-Rod's throw didn't yank Tex off the bag just before Joba served up maybe the worst pitch of his career (three-run homer), and if Matsui had gotten just an eighth of an inch more bat on the ball with the bases loaded . . .
. . . and if Jeter hadn't made the sort of error he hadn't made probably since he patrolled the infield in the Kalamazoo Little League . . .
. . . no, better, if Jeter hadn't made the sort of drop that made Luis Castillo look like the second coming of Nellie Fox . . .
. . . right before another three-run homer . . .
If if if if if if if if. Roger Angell, meet Rudyard Kipling.
Now today, with the Yankees up 2-0, I'm assaulted, thanks to Fox, by the 67th meeting this season between the Cardinals and the notoriously underexposed Cubs.
'Cause, you know, what a Houston baseball fan shut in by the oppressive heat wants to see on TV is a mid-July game between the Astros' two most hated rivals.
What was it Kissinger said about the Iran-Iraq war?